Steve Ballmer, owner the LA Clippers, may have splashed $50 million in fraud to help his team not win. Here are some things he could’ve spent that money on to achieve the same outcome (nothing):

• While Ballmer was CEO of Microsoft, they released the Zune. They only sold a few million of them. Ballmer could buy every Zune still available and have money left over to not help the Clippers win a title.

• Americans have a collective $1.814 trillion in student debt. Ballmer could’ve spent $49.9 million wiping it away, $10,000 on a really big spinning wheel to pick the people who get their debt cleared, and $50 on a webcam to stream it all on Twitch.

• There’s a guy who makes hats out of cucumber. Ballmer could buy $50 million worth of these hats. The guy would likely never fulfil the order but it’d keep him off the streets.

• Portrait of a Lady on Fire, one of the best movies of all time, had a budget of $5.67 million. $50 million would fund 8.8 films of similar scope, increasing the amount of good art in the world.

• As of 1 July 2023, Sudan had a population of 50,042,791 people. $50 million means they get $0.99 each.

• Wikipedia lists 93 improv theatre companies worldwide. That’s $537,634 each to stop it.